As others have said in other words: When you find yourself between a rock and a hard place, are you really being strong if you act just to avoid being crushed?
In my life-before-Witnesses I read the Bible and tried to understand God without much solid doctrine (I'd been a Catholic). There were times that terrible troubles or dangers to others(not only myself) came up, when I considered that these matters were more than just selfish concerns, I took them up with him. Outcomes that I could not attribute to chance unfolded. If I entirely gave up on the use of my brain and my senses as reliable tools for understanding. If I only decided that what others declared to be real would be my reality then and only then could I say that God was not a real presence outside my own self. As a result I was convinced of God being a kind teacher.
But my understanding of religion was very traditional. Churches disappointed me for ten years after---then I ended up with the Witnesses.
Rarely did I tell other Witnesses of those earlier events that first drew me to God. But when I told anyone, it was as though I was telling a really dirty joke. Little by little I realized that I had given up a friendship with God for a formal religion that made me deny the very love of God that the WTS claimed to extoll!
I had become sickened and somewhat passive. My children came to belief that I was a naturally unhappy person--but I knew that wasn't true. But I had been putout of touch with my own feelings and my own mistakes and my own God. After remembering how I used to relate to God so much more happily even in my ignorance-- I couldn't take it any more.
February 2009 I presented information that had bothered my conscience for years about the WTS literature. It really should have made the brothers happy to discuss it with me --but in my heart I knew it would get me in trouble. But since I was already suffering so much I went ahead.
That set the machinery in motion--In the Organization,their destruction of my soul was going to finish what was left of it. But as I saw how the best of my friends reacted to my personal action on behalf of the God I love--I was moved to think. They were afraid for me. Afraid! Even though I love God they were afraid for me. And no one talked about God. They talked about the Organization.
Thinking about God gave me strength. And I realized that the WTS Organization doesn't give a rat's @&& about God and they don't love people either. The way the Organization slowly corrupts sincere people into sick, negative sad-sacks who aren't allowed to touch their antiseptic God is more disturbing than any of the religious horror stories they ever told me.
Thinking about God gave me strength.